Friday, February 18, 2011

Day 4.....hanging in!

Today I felt looooow energy! I haven't been sleeping great so maybe that's it, or maybe it's because everything I'm putting my body through has started to catch up to me!! Regardless, I still pushed myself... we had an awesome hike - started with a 30 minute STEEEEEP climb up a mountain, and then a walk around a ridge with amazing views of the ocean (see pics below)! Hiked DOWN the mountain to explore a famous burned out house, and then the guides snuck in ANOTHER very steep climb. SO hard!! But I did it... and enjoyed it. We sign up for our hike on Saturday (usually we dont have a choice), and I'll sign up for that one again if it's possible. The forecast is for more rain tomorrow and Saturday so they're not sure what will be hikeable.... if we can't hike, we have to spend the 2 1/2 hours in the gym - I'd rather hike!!!

Today was a hard day also because it's the first day I felt hungry. Both lunch and dinner were so good and I just wanted more. But I'm trying to discern between wanting more because I am hungry or just that I want more because it tastes good. I don't think I was hungry - there's no way after eating such filling meals!! But all day I felt the familiar pangs of wanting  food..... sweet food, salty food, JUNK food.... anything. They are familiar feelings because I felt them ALLL the time at home... and usually acted on them in whatever was convenient. Here - that's not possible. The only extra food I can have at my meals is a salad. So I had a small one of those at both lunch and dinner after my meal to at least ensure I wasn't HUNGRY. Since I'm burning so many calories everyday - anywhere between 8000 and 10,000 I know that 1300 calories isn't a lot to be consuming, so perhaps my body really IS more hungry today. I did come back to my room and chew a bunch of sugarless gum. Maybe not the best thing to do, but it satisfied that sweet craving and made me feel less deprived.

Anyway, I'm trying to separate real hunger from emotional hunger and overeating for the sake of overeating.... they call it *intuitive eating* here - where you develop a healthy relationship with food and eat when hungry and stop before you're really full.... it's something I really hope to learn. Coming here I was every OTHER type of eater they describe here, I was a CHAOTIC, UNCONSCIOUS, EMOTIONAL, WASTE-NOT, REFUSE-NOT and a RESTRICTIVE eater. None of these are healthy...... and it seems like a lot of labels to overcome!!  But that's why I'm here... to change my relationship with food and to trust myself around it, and I've already learned a lot.

Well it's 9:15 and already waaay past my bedtime!!! See you tomorrow :)

6 comments:

  1. Leslie..you are doing awesome! Keep up the good work! I look forward to reading your blog everyday...your pictures are great!

    xo Sue

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  2. omg les, i didn't realize til just now that i can actually comment on here - so sorry to have missed your first four days! clearly i stepped away from my brain for a bit, BUT enough about me......YOU are doing so awesome! from the hikes, to the workouts, to pushing yourself, to articulating yourself so well, clearly you have been doing a lot of thinking, not to mention a lot of hiking!! the place looks beautiful, the hikes look intense, and their views are stupendous, the facility looks so great (i love your little bachelorette pad). you truly are an inspiration - keep it up, you are amazing! les, everyday you pat yourself on the back for having finished it - EACH day is an accomplishment and you have done it all on your own - YOU TOTALLY ROCK!!!! every day i can't wait for your next entry and look so forward to all those pics you've been taking - love the food ones, it all looks delish! i assume you will have the recipes :-)) i suppose with anything worthwhile, we must go through some difficulties - push through them les, i know you can do it, I KNOW YOU CAN and will! also, i think that when you come home, you will not only have achieved what you wanted to, you should look into a new career.....you really should write a book, in fact, you should start with this blog - it's so well written. okay, i suppose i should stop writing and monopolizing your blog, i just had to make up for lost comments (oh who am i kidding, i'll probably babble on in several more of your entries) okay, love you, keep moving forward, and know that little old me truly believes in you!! love shelley xoxo

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  3. WOW Les - so amazing to read your account and to see how you are staying focused on the positive. I am not so sure I would have the same attitude. Despite the HARD work it seems as tho you are getting along ok - the silver lining must be the glorious weather - a good trade from the bitter Ottawa cold!! I will keep tuning in for more reality from the world of exercise and healthy eating.
    Jxo

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  4. I love your blog. You are inspiring. We should start a neighborhood exercise group when you get back. Even if it's just walking or jogging once a week together.
    Kim T.

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  5. I would join a neighborhood exercise group too! though i might have to bring one of my kids along....

    Love your blog Leslie!
    Laura

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  6. I"m intrigued by your comments about the habits of eating. It's something that I can certainly relate to, so I hope (selfishly!) that you share more of your reflections, questions and/or conclusions about eating habits!

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